Ssssh You Just Don't Do....Project Twins

Shit You Just Don’t Do…. Project Twins

Way back in high school, some of you may remember this, I started a little book entitled shit you just don’t do. In it was a bunch of things like wearing white pants in the winter, weave’s in need of a perm, fake pink furs, and those God awful yellow stains in the armpits of white shirts. Yes, that was the standard shit you just don’t do in the eyes of a high schooler. Those were the days. But in light of growing up, shifting from the world of high school clicks into the world of everyman/woman for themselves, I’ve run across a whole list of shit you just don’t do. Unlike in high school where everything was materialistic, this grown up shit you just don’t do, takes on a whole ‘nother’ light.

So for this week’s edition (eluding that more will follow) of shit you just don’t do, I’m gone touch on the very touchy issue of Project Twins… Now before I start, this is meant for no particular person, in fact I was inspired by an episode of the very informative, politically correct, entirely credible, talk show…..Maury. So if you feel at this very moment that you’re about to become offended, please, please stop reading this. Now back to our normally scheduled program.
The definition of Project Twins: Project Twins are siblings who share one common parent, normally a father, and are very close in age, often only separated by a few months. These twins can be fraternal, and are rarely identical. The mothers of these Project Twins rarely if ever know of each other, which brings us to the first Shit You Just Don’t Do (SYJDD).

#1. Ladies, you just don’t get pregnant by a man you know has another woman
pregnant.

Now some of you may be screaming, Stephanie how the hell do I do that? I wasn’t tryna get pregnant by dude?

I don’t claim to have all the answers, but you know and I know that I got a valid point. This particular SYJDD has some sub categories. For instance, you don’t sleep with a man you know sleeping with another woman, A. And B, you damn sure don’t raw dog with this nigga. If he got both you and her pregnant, he was clearly doing both yall raw, does that make sense? So when the babies born and yall rolling necks, pointing fingers, and cussing each other out…calling her all types of nasty hoe’s, claiming she sleeping with this one and that one, just remember everything that went inside of her, went inside of you (forgive me for getting graphic, but yall know what I’m talking bout).

Nevertheless, even if this guy is a standup guy, which is highly unlikely, who does he devote his time to? Which baby mama gets the crib, and which gets the stroller? Who gets to break his fingers in the delivery room? You see where I’m going?

Not only is one of the Baby Mama’s gonna be neglected, but the Project Twins gone suffer too.
Often times, the baby that gets the attention from the father is the one whose mother is still messing with dude, and believe me, one of them still messing with dude. That other twin…well let’s just say, his mama still pissed after finding out about the other chick, and she don’t want anything to do with dude, so that baby lucky if it gets inclusion in daddy’s nightly prayers. Sadly, the closes daddy gone get to seeing lil’ ray ray is in Facebook newsfeeds. But rest assure, he’ll find out when lil ray start walking in his mama’s status updates. Crazyness if you ask me.

Now don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying that because he got two women pregnant at the same time, the latter women shouldn’t keep her baby over his crazyness…I’m just saying ladies if you know of this other chick and her pregnancy before hand, do everything in your power not to add to the situation. And if anything, ladies don’t be mad at each other, be mad at his stupid ass. Let these Project Twins know about each other. I would hate for them to be in Mr. Ratburn’s 1st grade classroom and find out they got the same last name, and same damn daddy. Aint nothing worse I'm sure then being at a parent teacher conference and having the teacher say, “You know lil ray ray is really good with the other students…you know I was telling his brother mother just a few minutes ago…” finish that sentence however you want.

Now men, don’t think you off the hook, I just figured it’s easier to talk some sense into a woman than it is into a man. But, men, don’t sleep with these chicks in a manner that will inevitably yield pregnancy, (see mommy, I can talk like you’ve spent thousands of dollars on my education). If you want to be a standup guy and take care of your kids, don’t you think that’s gonna be hard to do with a set of Project Twins. Picture this, after 12 long school years, graduation has finally arrived. Twin #1 goes to High School A, and Twin #2 goes to High School B. Graduation is on the same day, which one do you attend????? Think about it.

Now I know that I’ve been referring to these babies as project twins, but in no way do they have to live up, or down to the stereotype society has labeled their existence. These kids can go on to lead very productive, successful lives with or without their fathers. In no way are they to blame for their parents crazyness, and in retrospect, they are the only ones that should be shielded. Do right by these babies, both mothers and fathers, and don’t deny them the right to know each other. Let them decide whether or not they want to be involved in each other’s lives. That’s just my opinion, but them yo kids, you do what you want.

Until Next Time, remember….There’s just some Shit you just don’t do.


Deuces. Stephanie